Over the years, many parents have mentioned that, although their child is more than happy to come to class, getting them to do the related homework can be a complete nightmare. Firstly, it’s worth remembering that this is completely natural and it doesn’t necessarily mean that a child is going to be like this for the rest of their lives.
Parents try all sorts to get their child to do their homework but few look to psychology to help them. Below, we’ve looked at some research-backed, tried-and-tested ways of getting your child to do their homework without a war breaking out.
In an attempt to sympathise with their children, many parents introduce a difficult task by saying “I know it’s no fun but…” or “I know you don’t want to but…”. By starting off with a negative, you’re actually inviting your child to agree with you and to complain as well. Negativity can become a habit so it’s best to nip it in the bud.
If you want to sympathise with your kids, wait until they complain on their own. If and when they do complain, you can take that opportunity to look at the positives; for example, “I know you’re tired but this will help you to do well at school.” When you’re being positive about classes and homework, your child may well surprise you by being positive too.
Many parents reward their children for one action or another, whether it’s doing homework or doing chores. While this is effective in the short-term, research shows that when people become used to receive a reward for a particular behaviour, they will stop this behaviour as soon as the rewards stop. In terms of homework, this means once you start bribing/rewarding your child for doing homework, you’ll have to continue to reward them for the rest of their schooling if you want them to continue. In the long-term, you’ll want to avoid this vicious cycle if you want your child to be independent and successful in future.
Rather than giving a physical reward, like sweets or stickers, focus on how much your child has achieved. Encourage them to consider how their hard work has enabled them to increase their scores over time, showing them evidence of this if possible. Praise them for their work ethic as well. Giving occasional, unpredictable rewards will also help to motivate your child without them becoming too complacent.
By putting the emphasis on the results of their hard work, you’ll be teaching great habits that will last a lifetime.
Research shows that simply using the word “because” makes people more likely to do what you’re asking. Using this word is a sign that you have a good reason for what you’re asking (even if this isn’t really true), which makes people more likely to comply.
Use this technique when asking your child to do their homework. Simply saying “please could you start your homework because it’s due soon?” will reduce the chances of homework time turning into an argument.
Kids are often smarter than people give them credit for and they’re often capable of guiding their own studies. When asked, even our youngest students (aged 4 and 5) are able to give an opinion on whether they need more practice in an area.
Before starting on homework, give your child the opportunity to structure their work, deciding what to do first and what to leave for later. Guide their thought process by asking whether they want to do something enjoyable first or whether they want to get the hard work over and done with.
When children are making their own choices, they’ll be far more likely to push themselves rather than pushing against you.
Try to spread out your child’s homework rather than doing it in one long stretch. If scheduling means that you must do it all in one day, give your child the chance to take regular breaks (every 30-45 minutes). To help your child to maintain their concentration, you should also allow them to switch between subjects in order to sustain his/her interest.
Once your child has finally sat down to work, it can be tempting to try to squeeze everything in at once, however, doing this will only make things more difficult next time.
There are plenty of ways to help your child to learn outside of books and worksheets. Educational board games, times tables apps, crafts, performing arts clubs and science experiments all contribute to developing important skills that make your child an all-rounder that has a better chance of succeeding in life – not just at school.
Click below for more information on how our classes can make your child\’s 11+ preparation as stress-free and fun as possible.
e: contact@kinlearning.com
t: 07871 766937